NEVER FORGET

Celebrity media is pretty forgiving - I mean they can't  keep bringing up the same old scandals. That is unless you're more concerned with hating on celebrities than you are with providing fresh content. And that is what Champain is all about. It's not just painful for celebs, it's painful for readers.

As far as I'm concerned Fergie has done two interesting things in her life: meth and pee herself.

It's been 5 years since this incident but for me the delight the photo gives me is as fresh as the morning dew.

And who could forget Halle Berry's hit and run accident? Most people, considering it was 11 years ago. She claimed she fled the scene due to amnesia. That is such a soap opera excuse. Might as well say it was your evil twin. It doesn't even make sense. I guess she forgot to not get drunk, slam into another car and then speed away.

And how about when Rachel Zoe had all the Hollywood It Girls sporting gas chamber chic?

And Nicole Richie trashed Zoe on her Myspace (haha myspace)

What 35-year-old raisin face whispers her order of 3 pieces of asparagus for dinner at Chateau every night, and hides her deathly disorder by pointing the finger at me, and used her last paycheck I wrote her to pay for a publicist instead of a nutritionist? 

That pic of Nicole is priceless. It's like the opposite of thinspiration. If you need to gain weight keep that guy laminated in your wallet.

X Melissa